Orange SPV M500 / HTC Magician rant

So this is not so much of a review as a list of things I think are WRONG about this phone that I initially fell in love with (the idea of), and then grew tired of:

1. Why can't the screen-lock & keylock WORK? Can they not come up with a switch on the body that says LOCK, and does exactly that? Even if you keep the screen & keylock on, as soon as you get a text message / e-mail / reminder / call, the screen unlocks and starts communicating with the rest of the contents of my pocket. By the time I see the bloody thing, I've got about 16 new notes full of garbage, 5 new CRAP appointments & GPRS has been trying to fry an egg for half an hour.
   
2. The Password app hangs - This actually made me happy for a few days, since I thought this might be a solution (albeit imperfect, since messages & reminders manage to get around it) to my device-lock (& security) woes. But that was premature. The password app hangs routinely now... The bar at the top of the screen just says Password (no start button) . There is no X in the top-right, to close the current app, none of the icons at the top (signal, gprs, clock etc) interact or respond. All the hardware buttons stop working EXCEPT the dial button, which will bring up the phone app, but not actually dial the on-screen number. I can interact with the device to the extent of using the touch screen to dial numbers etc. I can access any of the features that are available from the phone app: send a text message, access contacts & notes. But that's it... so I can't get into the settings folder to access the Running Programs list & kill the password manager... at least I don't know how to. I can't access any other part of the device, so I have to lift the flap, hit the reset button & take a fifteen minute walk (or nap) while it comes back to life. Whoever the hell thought of making a Windows-based device without putting a hardware Ctrl + Alt + Del button (to bring up Task Manager / Running Programs) should be shot.
   
3. The voice app can't handle my phonebook names! Sorry, but my phonebook does not consist entirely of people called James, David & Caroline. In fact there are all kinds of names in there, and while I think (thought) the Fonix Voice App was quite cute to start with, I have realised it's also quite useless.
   
4. Why does it slow down to the point of needing a reboot every 3 days? WHY?
5. Why is it so slow even immediately AFTER a re-boot. Sometimes I re-boot, wait for startup to complete, press the call button, and wait for the phone screen to be built up block by block over the next 5 seconds.
   
6. Why can't I send a contact by SMS without a 3rd party app?
7. Why doesn't the phone log context menu allow me to add a number to an existing contact?
8. Why can't I do a "copy to clipboard" on a phone number from the phone app?
9. Why does it take 15 minutes to sync from PermaSave every time I reboot?